London ball

‘I’m desperately trying to get my helmet across London in time’: Sir Chris Hoy is less than impressed with the Jubilee Pageant kit… and can you blame him?

Sir Chris Hoy is one of six ‘cycling heroes’ who will lead a peloton of 300 cyclists pedaling vintage bikes through The Mall later today as part of the Platinum Jubilee Pageant… an honor slightly muted by the covers -head that he was asked to wear… .

“These are the ‘Team GB bike helmets’ provided to us for the Jubilee Pageant this afternoon,” he told his Twitter followers. “I’m desperately trying to get my own bike helmet across London in time or else I might have a bit of a stick for it.”

Friendly netizens, of course, responded sympathetically and certainly didn’t laugh at the thought of a six-time Olympic gold medalist walking around wearing something from Bob the Builder.

One amused viewer noted that the helmet looks remarkably like the ‘Dashel Team GB Olympic Edition Urban Bike Helmet‘ that Team GB were trying to whip fans out for £85 apiece… ‘Guess they have a lot of excess stock’…

Dame Laura and Sir Jason Kenny are also expected to feature as ‘cycling heroes’. No word from the golden couple if their own helmets are being transported to London as we speak.

According to reports released this week, Paralympic gold medalists Lora Fachie and Kadeena Cox will also be part of the group heading to Buckingham Palace and doing a 360-degree tour of the Queen Victoria Memorial.

Tom Pidcock’s name was also mentioned, although the conquering Ineos Grenadiers runner trained in Andorra and, based on yesterday’s Strava legend, will be setting his feet up today…

The 300-strong peloton will follow on a range of vintage bikes from across the Queen’s 70-year reign and, bizarrely, will be joined by Strictly Come Dancing pros Graziano Di Prima, Amy Dowden, Nikita Kuzmin, Cameron Lombard, Nancy Xu and Jowita Przystal on a pedal vehicle.

The £15million competition is split into four acts: For Queen and Country with a military parade; The Time of Our Lives progresses through seven decades of culture, music and fashion; Let’s Celebrate telling the Queen’s life story in 12 chapters with corgi puppets and carnival creations; and the Happy and Glorious musical show featuring Ed Sheeran and nearly 200 celebrities.

It remains to be seen where Sir Chris fits in? It could be the military parade if he wears this on his head…